Tips for Beating the Summertime Blues
“Sweet summertime.” Most have expectations for it to be filled with fun, laughter, water slides, outdoor grilling, fireworks and tons of memories made. That can be a lot of pressure on both students and their families. Summer is supposed to be fun and relaxing, but what if it’s not? Summer depression, similar to the “winter blues,” is actually more common than you may think, affecting not only students, but parents and family members as well.
As a parent or caregiver, there are multiple reasons you may be feeling down during these warmer months. If you went the whole spring semester following your normal daily routine and then suddenly have your college student back home with you, that set-in-stone daily routine has probably been disrupted.
On top of that, you may find yourself wanting to soak in every minute of having your student home, resulting in later nights and lost sleep. These slight alterations can have a big impact on your circadian rhythm, which can then affect your mental health. However, do not make yourself feel guilty about this. After all, you are not feeling sad because your student is home, it is just your body’s natural reaction to changes.
Another reason you may be feeling down in the dumps during the summer months is because you may be dwelling on the thought that your student has only a handful of these summer breaks left. Having them home is just a reminder that they are growing up right before your eyes, causing bittersweet feelings. Reality may start to set in as you realize you only have a few years left of that annual family vacation to the lake before your student enters the workforce and has limited vacation days. While these thoughts can be difficult to overcome, try your hardest to live in the present and enjoy these sweet moments with your student instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen in the future.
Your student may also be experiencing similar feelings. With them, however, it may bring more anxiety than sadness. How will I support myself? When do I need to start looking for jobs? Am I even ready to be an adult? These thoughts may be racing through your student’s mind. On the other hand, they may be enjoying summer more than they enjoy being in school. In that case, their blues may stem from the thought of simply having to sit in another lecture hall in just a few weeks.
So, what do you do? First, have a conversation. Open up to your student and the rest of your family about how you are feeling. You may discover that you are not the only one with a case of the summertime blues. Discuss your feelings, why you think you are feeling this way and ideas for combatting these feelings. Having this group discussion will help you avoid putting all of the weight onto your own shoulders to try and figure it out.
Get to the root of the problem. If you think it has to do with your routine being altered, try setting a new one that includes your student. Try to set strict bedtimes for yourself on worknights, eat dinner at the same time each night and maybe even try to throw in some self-care throughout the day whether it be a quick workout, time to read a book or time to journal your feelings.
If the sadness is stemming from the idea of having limited time left with your student, make the most of the time you have now instead of dwelling on the idea that they only have a few summer breaks left before they graduate. Make some new memories. Was there a fun summer activity that you did as a family when your student was in elementary school? Do it again! You never know, having a water fight or running down a slip-n-slide may be exactly what your student needs, as well. And these will be memories that will last a lifetime.
Most importantly, don’t beat yourself up, and don’t make yourself feel guilty. There is nothing wrong with you for having some sad thoughts and emotions in what you thought would be happy months. Chances are you are not alone and other families are having similar feelings. Soak up every last moment you have and try to make the best of your time with your student while they are under your roof, and never be afraid to ask for help.
